What New Year's Resolution?

Let's start off with the question I am sure you will hear more than once before the end of 2022: Where did this year go? It seems like we just started it along with all the well intentioned resolutions for change in this year. How did you do this year? Or shouldn't I ask?

That second question is the challenge for me. I start out the year with a list of maybe 5 things I will do/be better at/stop doing/who knows what. When I take the time to look back to see what ones made it to the end, it's a pretty lonely list. Like...empty list. Since March, empty list. The list was even purposefully small and that didn't seem to make a difference. Sound familiar? I think I see a number of heads nodding out there!

As we close in on the end of 2022, let's try something a little different. Take a minute and simply:

Reflect on what went well and be proud...all the way down to your heart kind of proud. How does that make you feel? Happy? Proud? Fulfilled?
Identify three things that could have gone better. Truly and honestly, was there anything you could have done differently? Remember, you can't go back and change those events, but you can learn from them for the next time. Make a note of what you have learned in a positive way. That's growth.
Think about all the people that made you smile this year. Take time to let them know that and thank them! They did or said something that truly touched you and stayed with you. Why not let them know that and make their day in the same way? Such a small thing as a text or email or, better yet, a phone call to simply say "Thank you, you made me smile." Those small gestures are greater and have more of a profound impact than you know. Oh wait...you're smiling so you do know! Share that!

Reflecting on just these aspects shows us we did receive quite a bit. Personal satisfaction, pride, a chance to learn and grow, a chance to appreciate the good things that do happen in our lives. And an opportunity to make a difference for someone else. All in all, that's pretty great!

So what about 2023? What if we didn't do resolutions next year but something that will have a lasting impact. Annie Taylor Label said it best calling resolutions "a to-do list for the first week of the year." She is so correct!

Words have such a strong impact (both positive and negative). They are also great guides to help us do a bit of self-reflection to make sure we are being the best person we can be. Let's do a little exercise.

What do you think about when reading the following phrases?

"Don't worry."
"Stop running around the tree."
"Whatever you do, don't fumble the ball."

Those words "don't", "stop", or "won't" are ghost words. When they are paired with an unwanted behavior, our mind focuses on and manufactures the very thing we don't want. Instead, mindfully select words that focus on the desired behavior instead of the dreaded one. For example. "I'm never eating processed foods again" turns into "I enjoy fresh fruits and healthy food that makes be feel clean and energetic." Switching those words that we choose to lose and to use transcends semantics. Making even a small change in how we articulate our resolutions or goals can make a big difference in whether they become reality. They actually help us live up to our vision of a better self.

Many folks have ditched resolutions and replaced it with a Word For The Year. This one word will be your "guide" or standard for the upcoming year. Any decision or action should be held up against your guide word to see if it truly aligns with it. This method has proven far more effective in getting habits changed and living the desired life.

Inner Ki, as part of their "Wellness & You" is offering a 2 hour workshop to help you determine your Word For The Year. It will be offered in person on January 15 (in person class) and January 16 (via Zoom). Check it out!